A Man in Love, a wonder to behold!

It's good to see a man in Love!

A woman in love is great but to behold a man giddy in his infatuation is really a wonder to behold!

And so it has been for Mr George Clooney in these past few days up to his wedding to Amal Alamuddin. Watching it restores the idea of how love and being in love ought to be; it's suppose to 'idyllic' and euphoric.  I wanted to write about something else for this entry but I just thought I'll write something about the couple while the marriage and all are still fresh in the mind and while it speaks to me strongly.

So they had a whirlwind romance and then the wedding.

Love struck couple (Courtesy Getty)

It was pleasing to the soul watch him confess his love for Amal publicly, this eligible marriage-wary forever bachelor say how he couldn't wait to be married to her while given a speech a few weeks back. This woman bewitched him and he was so entranced that he went back on a vow not to marry again after the breakdown of his first marriage. It was good to watch it all, to see George so inspired and bursting with love and happiness -heck just watching him inspired me too lol- but I think more importantly it was good for George himself. It is good for men (despite talk to the contrary) to be heady in love. Who watching George could not but agree that he looked alive, looked healthier and happier than we have ever seen him, and a more optimistic person being so in love. Yet to hear some people talk you would think that men 'loosing themselves in love' should be avoided at all costs!

 

I don't want to idealize Amal and the circumstances around their romance but I guess it was her combination of attributes that clicked for him and was an offer he couldn't let go whereas with other women there just wasn't that final piece who knows. But one cannot doubt her intelligence(Oxford and NYU), talent and ambition in addition to femininity and beauty.

 

I am sure if you had told George last year 'George look, you have too many women at your beck and call, its not good for you. Lets change things a bit and give you a woman who you must work to get and work to impress. She wont fall into your lap, she will be as brainy as she is classy, distinctively stylish as opposed to classically doll looking,' I think George might have said, folks you are just making this thing damn complicated, give me a dolled up woman, any woman that appeals to me on sight, I just love women and enjoy like feminine company.'

 

Its not just men I suppose, many of us are quick to reach for fast foods to dull our hunger, we can be unimaginative and impatient and maybe closed off to more transcendent living and heightened being. In the area of love in particular we often don't know what's good for us and what will satisfy our souls, with our raft of prejudices and prerequisites and preferences for love to happen.

 

So like I said, it is good for men to be in heady in love -I wanted to say crazy in love but I think that phrase means something than what I think it means; I think it means psycho in love lol - to be so inspired that 'I am not good at marriage' becomes 'I damn well am gonna be so bloody good at this marriage thing because I want this woman, what else but married would I want to be'.    

 

Sadly today's dating environment breeds men who just want it in their lap like yesterday. If a woman doesn't jump to a man's call, he is off to the next. So many lazy men looking for the easy catch. Men feel personally affronted if they are made to exert some effort to 'court' a woman. Sadly I believe this attitude will mean that many will never get the opportunity to experience the heady and soaring feelings of those who have won through to love.

 

Many happy years to the happy couple!

Next post available 13th October 2014

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We are rooting for you!

I received a lovely gift from one of my fellow Bloggers and readers, and I felt truly blessed. I can only say to S THANK YOU!

 

My last blog entry was something from my personal circumstances and you know it got me thinking about falling short on all those goals and promises we made about how we would do A or achieve B by a given deadline. Indeed sometimes when you read the writing of BWE bloggers, you can be left with the impression that the changes we require from black women are just a short walk away, but the truth is that most of the changes required to 'live well' will take anything upwards from 18 months.

 

Think about it for a second. Say you are overweight, it is possible to loose all the weight in a couple of months, but realistically anyone who has weight to loose and not just the odd flab (and that by the way is the category that most of us weight losers fall into!) will require on average a year and a few months, to sort themselves out if they are consistent that is. If they are not as consistent as they should be, the years can pretty much stretch out ahead. I know, I speak from experience (I must add here that it is important to start the journey no matter how long it will take and don't delay, make a start or a year will quickly pass by and you are still without any kind of progress no matter how little on your situation).

 

I will be writing an entry soon on the 5:2 diet which I think has so many benefits particularly for black women but for now, back to the point I am making, which is that you need to give yourself time and be patient as you steer towards your overall goal. Lets think about other things like getting yourself a good career; you might have to go back to school or start a business. It might take you two years to retrain and a good part of five years to start seeing a profit from your business. What about marriage and getting a good mate. Unless you fall into a very very lucky category of humans, from finding a man to marriage should take you on average upwards of 18 months!

 

As a modern woman use all the modern short cuts and modern 'ways and means' for speeding up your journey.
Drudgery is out! 

Check out this blog
 

I am saying all this to say, don’t beat yourself up if you haven’t achieved all those lovely things you pledged you would after reading our blogs years ago now. As long as you are on the journey, keep at it and don’t loose hope. Don’t quit and you will get there. Keep striving to leave that neighborhood, to get a good job/business etc husband etc etc don’t think that you have let us and BWE down because a couple of years have past and you haven't achieved the goal you said you would at the end of that year. What lessons is life teaching you? Don't be too bitter to note the life lessons along the journey that seems unending. Remember the saying, 'Don't forget to smell the roses.' Life is really in the journey and not really the goal. You are on your own special journey different from everyone else.

 

There are some of us who preach who are also at probably the same points on the journey as you our readers. You would be very surprised to learn!

 

Next post available 30th September 2014

E-books now available on Amazon. Please click on the corresponding links below for more info.

 

First Steps to Personal Empowerment
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Do Black Women in Afros
Date White Guys?
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Supposing I wanted to
Date a White Guy...?
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Lessons from the Neighborhood

Hope you all had a good summer!

A little story for a teaching lesson:

 

My neighbor and I had called in some estate officials to bear witness to another noisy neighbor. We were thinking that we had a good case because he was in full flow at the time when we had them come on a Friday night. However when they the officials sat down to tell us what kind of noise was now classed in the unacceptable range, I almost lost it! The threshold is now so high, that to meet the noisy level range, this neighbor would probably have had to be using a pneumatic drill in his house. I am very noise sensitive and I believe I have written about other noisy neighbors in the past on this blog. This time again my worst nightmare has moved even closer to my house. 

 

Let me say that the area I live in has rapidly deteriorated from a nice lush area only 3 years ago because it was targeted by government to house social 'misfits' who were being housed in much more expensive inner London. When the price difference became just too great the government started to move 'problem folk' -which it had a duty to house- to the area. I know I will need to move but if you know anything about the way Britain is going, the South-east of England is being taken over by rich Russian Oligarchs who have a couple of millions to spare which I don't-one of the reasons we preach for black women to have wealth is for such situations where you have to move and move and move again if necessary.

Jourdan Dunn - credits to styleblazer

An article that should be celebrating the best of black womanhood becomes one emphasizing how we just love to make wrong choices, love single motherhood are always aggressive and hardship-seeking as a habit!

Anyway in my anger and upset I forgot a key message which I often and constantly preach especially to black women and that is that they should stop being taken for a ride by all this chit chat they hear about our fair societies and feeling that we will be protected by all these nice sounding government leaflets etc etc. Indeed I thought that the law and policies would protect my rights to not be disturbed at weekends by overgrown children, but what I didn’t realize (well I know but it was being painfully brought home to me really and truly in this instance) was that these 'laws' are written by an elite group of citizens to appeal to their interests and most importantly their sympathies and weird biases.

 

What am I talking about? In truth, if you are unaware, we now live in a society where the rich effectively remove themselves from the 'dregs' of society, at the same time they champion the rights of these dregs over the rest because they are in their worldview 'poor little folk who have been 'failed' by the system in some way!'-however they do not move these dregs anywhere in striking distance of them and their children. Prioritizing the underclasses particularly over honest, hard-working citizens in society has become a favorite pastime of the British elite, that it now 'pays' to be 'kept' by government than put in a honest days work for a paycheck at the bottom end of the skills market. It also means the hard working and honest pay the price (sometimes the ultimate price) for the 'indulgence' of these feral and destructive sections. I am a recovering lefty myself and used to champion the idea of 'care in the community' until a couple of folk going about their everyday business got their heads cut open by axe-men who had been 'released' into the community from mental institutions. And if you haven’t heard the latest about the rape and trafficking of over 1400 young British girls while the elite turned a blind eye because they were 'white trash' and their favorite minority class (British Muslims) was implicated in the abuse, please read a good summary here

The bible says that the rich rule over the poor, how could I have forgotten. No matter what left wingers tell you, the world is very unfair and works in favor of the rich/er and their particular interests and strange emotional attachments to folk who make life unpleasant for the rest - as long as these ones are nowhere near them of course. So no matter what people say try to get yourself to the side where you control your wealth because it is so F)&^ unfair and I felt like stamping my feet at the unfairness of it all. I started to speak up in my resentfulness of the whole unfairness of having to meet unreasonable standards of noise making proof, but from my peripheral view I noticed that my neighbor had started to 'act' to get her way, even flirted with the officers and (as she told me later), dragged her son out of bed to say how he was being kept awake because of the noise. After a while I kept my mouth shut and let her play the game she was playing. I had started speaking in my anger at the unfairness and I kind of sensed that this approach was putting the officers on the defensive (having to defend the way the policy was written regardless of how senseless it was) but this woman realized that she needed to get her way and went for the best strategy. It was her strategy that seemed to make the officials begin to see it our way and see that it was just unfair to say that we should put up with the noise because it wasn't 'high enough' - imagine that!

Folks, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do, and what you gotta do sometimes is not rely on the laws and statutes being anything more than a let down. This episode was a reminder that it pays to play the best strategy than whine about the unfairness of the situation. We all have just about 657,000 hours (give or take) on this planet and we need to live most of it in peace and comfort!



Next post available 15th September 2014

E-books now available on Amazon. Please click on the corresponding links below for more info.

 

First Steps to Personal Empowerment
Amazon

 

 

 

 

Do Black Women in Afros
Date White Guys?
Amazon

 

 

 

 



Supposing I wanted to
Date a White Guy...?
Buy Here or Buy at Amazon