Thursday, October 18, 2012

More on black boys and their attacks of black girls and the 'upper-cutting' bus driver

When I wrote about the habit of black boys beating down black school girls, a number of readers wrote in about their experiences. Thank you for the responses. I have held off mentioning this pattern that I had noticed with black boys and their targeting of black girls for physical abuse, even though I have been noticing it for a while now. I believe it is simply an extension of the toxic black female hatred situation within the black community where black women and girls are disrespected and devalued, and this mindset is now communicating and implanting itself in black boys as soon as they start to understand and actively related to black girls.



Soul Alive wrote:
My daughter is in Middle school here in the states, and she informs me some loser Black kid came and asked her for the answers to an assignment. She quickly told him, what have you ever done for me? I lol'd at how sharp she is. On a more serious note, I advised her to stay away from that type. She went on to tell me that when she refused to capitulate, he whined and fussed. Eventually one of her friends gave him the answers as well as loan him a pencil! I told her to avoid that friend.

Turns out when the dirt bag was done with the pencil, he threw it at the young lady who had just helped him. I teach my daughter from YOUNG to avoid most things Black and male.

Soul alive provided here, an example of the problem that black girls who are aware and want to distance themselves from the whole unhealthy will face. When other black girls, yield themselves and their bodies to the idea of venerating black boys and catering to their wants and needs, they actually begin to create an environment where every black girl, (even the ones who do not accept this state of play), will become endangered. Mothers must never shy away from discussing this issue with their daughters (the toxicity of black circles, the entitlement behaviour of black boys and the constant black female endangering appeasement and veneration coming from other black girls/women) and pointing out the clear examples as in this case, of what such a general dynamic brings about; the out of control sense of entitlement of black men/boys and the subsequent bodily and emotional harm of black girls in their line of sight.

AK wrote:
The black girl said to her 'Come on Michelle man! I've been hit before plenty of times it's no big deal. Just go back down man you're holding up the bus!' I have to hand it to the biracial girl though she still stood her ground and refused to get up and she said 'No, I don't like being hit and he was there slapping me on my face going mad'. Then of course the WM driver stopped the bus and people had to get up and get out and wait for the next bus. A bunch of older white people were about to get on one of them had her young biracial daughter/granddaughter almost about to cry and the woman was cradling the girl's head.

Yes, you have black girls and black women actually contributing to this environment where black men are king. They shore it up, fetch the necessary players (i.e. other black girls who will serve and bow down to black men). They disarm other black girls who may think to resist. They wear them down with accusations that they are uppity, self haters etc, and cause them to doubt themselves and their desire to be treated with respect. They gather the surplus of black females that will be required for the harem of black men and to ensure that the number advantage and resultant devaluation of black women continues (this is why even black women who know that too many black women chasing black men has a negative impact on black women's ability to bargain for fairness and positive treatment, and who have even experienced what it does for the black woman's desire for fairness and respect, continue to push for black women to remain surplus to black men).

These black women and girls have become toxic to themselves and there isn’t much one can do but separate from and instruct your daughters to keep away from them and their circles or else they will work on you mentally and otherwise to recruit you to that social order and they will not rest, because a black woman operating outside this state of play an affront to them and their identity.

 
The 'Uppercutting' bus driver
 
Shidea on right. Should she be punched or should she be arrested, that is the question.

Most readers would have by now come across this incident widely reported on the net (if not type 'bus driver uppercut' in google. I find it very intriguing especially since a couple of days before I had written this:

...And let a black girl even tap a black boy lightly even in a playful manner, and that becomes a reason to viciously beat her down because, 'she hit me first'.

In this case the black girl in question Shidea N. Lane was without doubt very aggressive and as they say 'put her hands on the driver first'.

The driver made a curious statement, about how if she wanted to be treated like a man, 'he would treat her like one.' I think its a very telling one, that suggests underlining belief that black women who are aggressive need to be dealt with with brutal boxing ring force as opposed to being restrained (e.g. blocked, arms twisted behind their backs, shoved away). There was nothing in the driver's reactions that was about self protection etc as can be seen (the woman was standing before him calmly when he swung back and gave her that massive uppercut that even a man twice her size). His actions came from a place of hatred not frustration or self protection and I am not surprised (but many of you are curiously) that he has been suspended. His statement was a 'real' statement about where his heart was.

Apparently according to reports, the driver continued to fight with this passenger until he was separated by other passengers.

Well the bus service has issued its own statements

"His behavior is absolutely unacceptable. RTA apologizes to our customers for this incident."

I am glad it is the bus service that is holding to the professional and decent line (as usually is the case with black folks who don’t know what is decent), while black folks continue to argue about how she put hands on him first! (some of you might like to 'restudy' the video again and see if you can understand why the bus company took the line it did)

A significant number of people dwelling in black milieus have lost touch with decency and it is taking external people to reinforce and reimpose the idea and state of decency where black people congregate. Living in the black milieus can be deduced to lead to distortion of what is wrong and right and what is decent.

But the saddest thing in all this is that it is clear that even some who profess BWE, and BWE proponents have also lost touch with decency.

However will you find it?


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17 comments:

Zabeth said...

“My daughter is in Middle school here in the states, and she informs me some loser Black kid came and asked her for the answers to an assignment. She quickly told him, what have you ever done for me? I lol'd at how sharp she is. On a more serious note, I advised her to stay away from that type. She went on to tell me that when she refused to capitulate, he whined and fussed. Eventually one of her friends gave him the answers as well as loan him a pencil! I told her to avoid that friend.”

I had this very thing happen to me when I was in high school. A young man in my math class felt ENTITLED to copy off of me during tests. I told him he couldn’t and covered my work. Even then I knew it was wrong for him to expect me to do all the work and he’d reap all the benefits.

Seed Sower said...

I see what is being said and I agree, but in regards to the "she hit him first" statement, we have to separate women who are in unwarrented abusive situations from women who engage in aggressive behavior and put themselves in dangerous situations where the outcome may not be in their favor. In situations like this it gets very tiresome to hear people respond that because a woman has a vagina therefore she should be excused from the consequences of her actions. If this had been a cop she hit and he hit her back would we have the same stance about the matter?

This is not in support of what the bus driver did (and also remember assaulting a city employee can come with a fine and jail time in many states)but not all men adhere to the "men don't hit women" philosophy and she got herself embarassed when she came against one who did not. Black Women cannot afford to put themselves in situations where they can be harmed by some crazed DBR male like this bus driver. It is one thing for a woman to hit a man in self defense to protect herself or her children quite another when she goes looking for a fight and gets more than she bargained for.

cattusbabe said...

Sorry but there was no excuse for the bus driver to hit this women.

Sure she did board his bus and did not have her fare. Sure he told her to leave. Sure she refused.

What people who feel that this women got what she deserved are missing is this. The bus driver actively participated in escalating this situation until the women hit him.

THIS is unprofessional behavior. This is why he is on suspension. You cannot tell me anywhere in his employer's code of conduct that his getting into a verbal confrontation with an unruly passenger is within procedure. This is what I wrote about this incident on another site that was discussing it:
"This man had not only himself but every passenger to consider as well as anyone walking or driving in the vicinity of his bus.

He should not have escalated the incident to the point of assault by answering this women in kind. Whatever amount of money that fare was, it was probably less than two bucks, was not worth putting himself, the passengers and the general public at risk. So yes he should have kept his cool and put her out at the next stop. If she refused to leave he should have called the cops.

Dealing with unruly passengers is a part of his job and he should have put the safety of the other passengers and public foremost and not get into a pissing contest with some nutty woman. There is no excuse for his actions which may be why he did not report his actions to his employer.

If it were up to me he would not have a job."

Now I know that in some quarters i.e. the black community, that this bus driver's action is seen as normal behavior and that the woman got want she deserved. It is not which is why the bus company took the actions that it did.

Verbally escalating a confrontation to the point of assault is not acceptable behavior. That this bus driver felt that he was well with in his rights to do so with this women is telling. That he would take it to the point of hitting her the way that he did was telling.

That members of the black community feel that his actions were justified is down right frightening. I am so glad I do not have to depend on you alone for my wellbeing and safety.

In far too many situations the only protection that I as a black women would have is not from the within black community. It is from the greater community at large. In far too many situations the only redress that I would have for a grievance is not within the black community but from the greater community at large. This is a sad state of affairs but is one one the main reasons that I do not live in a majority black community.

Zoe said...

...And let a black girl even tap a black boy lightly even in a playful manner, and that becomes a reason to viciously beat her down because, 'she hit me first'.

Absolutely. Unfortunately too many bw, even many in the bwe community still don't get it.

ak said...

White women get excused from the consequences of their behaviour all the time as whites feel that their men have more accountability than their women and no matter how tiresome you think that is, they're not going change the way they think of gheir women for you. This way of thinking is similar different parts of the world too. But black men and black women hate and disrespect black women and disregard black women out of indifference and have no empathy unless she's probably a 99 yr old church going lady (maybe anyway). Therefore an outcome like the young woman who received the uppercut is inevitable.

Blacks would rather die than put a black woman on any kind of a pedestal. They want her gazing up from the foot of the pedestal and to have her stiffen her neck from looking up all the yime at that.

Soul Alive said...

Everyone cheering online and stating she deserved it are dead wrong. I cautioned many a Black woman from supporting this position. It sends the message that yes, we support Black women getting punched in the face because they are loud and unruly. Its fine with us, in fact we find it funny.

The next person to be punched may be you and please do not be surprised if no one rallies to your defense either. No matter how many degrees you may have or how well you may have been dressed.

Its the collective image of Black women that he is attacking. Does no one see this?

I re-evaluated a lot of people and what I initially thought about them based upon their reaction to this video. I dont need anyone who agrees that Black women should be punched dead in the face as my friends or even in my circle. And nevermind a suspension, that bastard should be fired!

Zoe said...

"...I re-evaluated a lot of people and what I initially thought about them based upon their reaction to this video. I dont need anyone who agrees that Black women should be punched dead in the face as my friends or even in my circle. And nevermind a suspension, that bastard should be fired! ..."

100% agree.

ak said...

My words exactly Soul Alive. BW seem to be the only human or even the only creature on Earth who strongly dislikes or works so hard against the grouping that they naturally have the most in common with. Yes a black woman has black skin just like a black man does but unless she wants to spend on the surgical operation that Cher's daughter had, then she'll never get a penis!

Why go against other black women just to go against them? Can't they see that their OWN position will rise as other BW's positions in the world rises? Yeesh!

Aisha said...

"What people who feel that this women got what she deserved are missing is this. The bus driver actively participated in escalating this situation until the women hit him."

I absolutely agree cattusbabe. The driver ACTIVELY provoked an angry passenger until it reached the point of violence. This is where he loses credibility.

The woman hitting him is still inexcusable, but in my opinion, he was more than a willing participant. I think he enjoyed the entire confrontation from start to finish and relished the opportunity to use violence. He looked like he was waiting to do that for some time and she was foolish enough to give him a reason.

squarlymade said...

OMG, that was horrific! That hit didn’t kill her? I’m glad you’ve written about this. That man should be in jail. There was no-need for that. He was being a vindictive shemale. There are wrong crazy acting people all over the planet and a way to respond to them. What he did to her proves the way he was raised and thinks about women. Take a real man and he would have responded completely different.
“He looked like he was waiting to do that for some time and she was foolish enough to give him a reason.”
I agree Aisha.
I ran into the grocery store the other day to grab some ingredients I had forgotten earlier that day. Some garlic and onions. I just wanted to quickly get inline and get out of the store. The lines where filled with people, so I migrated towards the shortest. Well I spotted a black man in the lane adjacent and had to think hard if I wanted to take that chance (there are not very many black men around here in my town of under 8,000..but some are blowing in). I decided I would but made it a point NOT to give EYE CONTACT or acknowledge him. I could see with peripheral site that he was with a white guy at self-check out. An older couple got behind me, and as I moved up in line I was eased that nothing eventful had happened. Right before I was checked out I heard that white guy whisper something to the black guy. The black guy then very LOUDLY said. “Oh, yeah, That, that’s trouble is what that is”. The man (couple) behind me turned and looked at him then looked at me. I could tell that older gentleman behind me was offended and not amused. Then the cashier (another) man started asking me if I had gotten everything I needed-I made sure to assert myself to show who I really was. I said ‘yes I was in here earlier but forgot to get these ingredients-I’m making chili’ –sound, I’m not on the market I’ve got obligations at home and I’m not the least bit interested-enough?
Later that night I told my husband while we were in bed. I don’t run and tell him everything. But I was so bothered by this and couldn’t really figure out why. Also, my husband always tells me when he sees a new black person in our town and I wanted to tell him not to go making friendly with these bm just because. He hadn’t before but I just didn’t know what all this black person counting would transcend to-LOL. And he needed to know that I’m uncomfortable with black men (as a society).
I think what bothered me about this black man was A.) He thought he had the “rights” to speak over me and say who I was B.) He acted as though I would even be interested in him C.) He acted as if he needed to stay away from me because I was “trouble” and he needed to say this very loudly to everyone.
I told my husband “I’m YOUR wife”. My husband didn’t say much about the incident, but I could see him registering what I told him. I’ve seen him do this before. When I tell him something he banks on it-so I know he’ll use that information in whatever way is necessary.
I live in the vision of who my husband says I am –not that con-artist.

ak said...

Squarelymade I see where you're coming from exactly regardinf your trip to the supermarket.

Love in all colors said...

I always feel sooo sorry for bw/bg's for the hell they go through evryday.this should be a TRUE WAKE! call for bw everywhere,and take their live more real.this really hurt my heart,and i know it's happening more and more to bw.

maria cummings said...

When I saw the video I was beyond appalled. That driver could have handled the situation better. Someone mentioned that it appeared as if he enjoyed the entire confrontation from start to finish and I'll have to agree with that.
My message to black women; avoid all black men at all cost, unless they're your father, brother etc.
If you do not know him, avoid him completely. No not make eye contact because that's an invitation for something potentially bad to happen. Black men will never protect black women. If you're a smart black women, then you should seek out protection else where. My SO (who is white and jewish) will never allow me to be in a potentially dangerous situation because unlike black men, they protect their women. You will never see something like this happening to a non black woman. I'm not saying it doesn't happen, but the chances of something like this happening to a white woman is very slim. And we all know that there are aggressive, confrontational and annoying white women out there.

The whole incident was so disturbing to watch. The bus driver had no right to hit her. If he had handle the passenger in a professional manner, the whole incident could have been avoided. No he went on and on with the verbal confrontation with the passenger for a full 20 minutes while other black passengers looked on and laughed as they were entertained by the verbal exchange between passenger and driver. It was as if he forgot where he was...AT WORK!

Like I said, black women should and must avoid any and all situation with black men. Do not talk to them, do not date them, do not sleep with them and do not support them. Non of these will benefit you. The only women who benefit from any form of interaction with black men are white women. Hence Kim K and Amber Rose. So please black women, open your eyes and forget black men! If you're walking down the street and you see one, just cross the street. This is what I do. My life has improved 10 folds since I cut all black men out of my life. I have surrounded my self with people who value my femininity and my existence. And not one of them is black!

Jazine said...

Thank you, Soul Alive. I, too, had to re-evaluate some black women after they shared their thoughts about the bus driver incident on another blog. I was thinking, if you feel this is a legitimate way of problem solving, stay the heck away from me. I also couldn't help but feel a lot of these same bw would have sung a different tune had the woman the bus driver retaliated against was white. Black girls and women still orbit a deadly space where our bodies can be trampled on. The girl shouldn't have started anything, but that isn't the point of Halima's argument. Too many bw that sided with the actions of the bus driver is missing the larger point and its consequences.

squarlymade, I understand exactly what you went through with the guy in the supermarket. It is a unique dynamic that outsiders have a hard time understanding. I have my boundaries drawn in the sand when it comes to dealing with black men in public spaces, including social events and the scant few bm colleagues at work. Most of them want to 'try it' in some form, and I'm not having it.

Maria Cummings, a lot of people would find your perspective harsh, but hey, sometimes the truth hurts!

Lady of Restoration said...

Soul Alive said...
Its the collective image of Black women that he is attacking. Does no one see this

I live outside of the area where this occurred.... and yes I agree with what Soul Alive said. He is for whatever reason beating of black WOMEN in his mind, not just a black woman.

Dee Dee Russell said...

It's no secret that I live in San Francisco a city with a small AA population but most of the aggressive bums on the street are AA men. I steer clear of them and never give them one penny.

I dress for my body shape and my signature is trench coats in many colors (except no black ones!), I wear them as coats and as dresses. I don't wear bling or high heels, its a classy classic look.People seem to like them.

After a stroll near the famous cable cars I stopped at a local store, clad in a simple beige trench coat. 2 AA followed me in the store and I saw them and went the other way. One tried to follow me, I cut him off.

One bellowed from the back of the store SHE GOT ON A TRENCH COAT WHAT SHE GOT ON UNDER THAT TRENCH COAT!!? I was in line and watched the clerk (Middle Eastern) he looked resigned.

Right then and there I placed my items back on the shelf and muttered "I don't need this - this is harrassment." The other AA man seemed surprised and said to his friend "she said you harrassing her". I left & quickly crossed the street. One came out the store and bellowed: YOU CAN COME BACK IN AND BUY YO STUFF.

They just can't leave us alone and give us peace they need attention. When men act that way I know they are fatherless, impotent, weak and lost

Ebonychic205 said...

No one was preaching "She hit him first" when Chris Brown put his hands on Rihanna. I vaguely remember his fans saying the very exact "Well she could have hit him first" and people got pissed the hell off like "How dare you say something like that defending a man hitting a woman under any circumstances" no one even cared to know if he was so called hit forst or injured or not. Youtube videos filled with "Woman beater" phrases not one person took it into consideration if he was physically harmed or her so called "stepping to a man". The same women sharing their stories about their abusive relationships and why they think no woman should hit a man or prepared to be hit back and not use their vaginas as a excuse, are the same one's using the same stories about why it so called hit home regarding the Rihanna situation, I was like you have to be kidding me. It made me realize how our community and society values a black woman or whether this particular black woman is worthy of protection or not.
See the young was everything society and black people hate to see in black women, she wasn't attractive enough, they assumed she was from a low pverty environment therefore giving them the right to label her a hoodrat so in other words she had no right to defend herself at any point, she should have just sat there like a good little puppy dog as she was already on thin ice to begin with. It shows you how undervalued black women are that we have to be these make believe perfect visuals of creatures for people to even take into considering protecting us. I've sen videos of black men, gay men, and white women being in physical situations where they were called racial slurs, and gay slurs and attacking the person who verbally said something to them. Not once did people bring up "Hit first" and defended the person they hit. They were excused because we felt they were discriminated against and insulted as group, now why isn't that applied when a woman is in a situation with a man? I'm not talking about only when it's Rihanna whom we cherish but in general? Sexism and misogyny is a discrimination practice but it seems like the only acceptable prejudice left with black people practicing it the most, we should know better being a oppressed group. I guess as long as it protects and benefits black men right?