Monday, March 03, 2014

Don't get led away from your goals and your dreams in life

It seems that Mr Simon Cowell has finally been 'landed.'
 
Ok he may not be married to the woman but he is now the proud father of an infant son and it seems very clear that he will do all he needs to be in his sons life! He has taken to twitter and other media to display what is no doubt a deep genuine affection between father and new born. Insider accounts say he is besotted with the young bairn who he quite telling named Eric, after his late father. 'I have waited for you all my life' he is reported to have said at the arrival of Eric. It's lovely to see such father son affection, especially from someone like Simon Cowell who often seems incapable of loving anyone but himself. I wish him every joy in the world and it is easy to see that Eric is helping Simon plug the huge gaping hole in his heart that came about when his father died. Anyone who knows anything about Syco (yes the name of Simon's business concern), knows that Simon's father was the only man Simon strove to impress and losing his father just before his success was cemented was a very big blow to him.
 
Simon will now do everything to be in his son's life
 
Anyway why am I giving a rundown of the history of Simon Cowell?
 
I am writing about this intriguing story because Simon claimed for years and years to the media and to girlfriends that he wasn’t ever intending on being a father. He announced it repeatedly to all who could hear, that he was not a family man. I am certain he meant it for the time and I don’t think he really changed his mind, he just found himself expecting a baby with his paramour and she wanted to keep it and that was that. Suddenly he is enjoying fatherhood more than he ever thought he would or could and you see, that’s the thing, sometimes people genuinely don’t know what will make them happy. In life we sometimes stumble on the path that fulfills us, that’s why it is important not to close yourself off from other parts, people and situations. Sure we all specialize and focus in, as we grow older. We decide we will be a carpenter rather than a poet or a doctor rather than an electrician but if you become rigid about not letting yourself experience life beyond narrowed boundaries, you can miss out on so much that life has in store.
 
So my mind goes to the girlfriends who took his disinterest in being a father seriously. I know some broke up with him over this stand, others I think sadly might have tried to go along with his no child agenda and it might have severely damaged their own abilities to have their own offspring- one particular girlfriend comes to mind when I say this.
 
In truth, it’s very easy to go along with another persons 'agenda' and damage your own dreams, especially if you have become attached and feel that that is the only way to hold on to them. Si Co is a powerful man, with the lifestyle to match and the networks and connections that can make life smooth and pleasant for any woman. It could be all too easy to convince yourself under these 'incentivising' circumstances that you are of the same mind as him in the matter of children. I am glad some of his girlfriend parted company with him eventually to maybe keep their dreams of children alive. Which brings me to the second point.
 
Some of these women who moved on might look back and regret, but the truth is that their 'timelines' did not coincide with where Simon was at the time. This is a reality of life and you should not kick yourself if you cant get yourself on the same page as your romantic other. Don't hang about or try to make them fit with what you want to do or where you want to be. You must have the courage to move on. Even if you see that later they went and did exactly what you wanted from them but with someone else, know that it wasn’t for you and them. It’s easy to say, 'maybe if I had waited', but it is unlikely they would have 'changed' for you.
 
A lot of people change because of experiences and often times we act as that experience for others. Coming across us might be that catalyst for a change in some people's lives. I know men who have mistreated women and lost a good thing, learning a hard lesson on how not to treat people for their future. Some white men have let priceless black girlfriends slip out if their fingers (and vice versa) because of family, nay sayers and what have you. Having gone through that experience, they come out on the other side, vowing to never let others mess up their good thing ever again!
 
So to summarize, you must not sacrifice your dream to be with someone because you will regret it. Also you have to know what you want, what your deep felt desires and dreams are because If you don’t, it is easy for someone with their own firm ideas about what they want from life to sweep you along with them and apply you and your energies to what they want to do.

Once you have defined what things you want out of life. Pursue it with vigor! 

Next post 15th March 2014

E-books now available on Amazon. Please click on the corresponding links below for more info.
 
First Steps to Personal Empowerment
Amazon
 






 






 
  
Do Black Women in Afros
Date White Guys?
Amazon
 






 






 









Supposing I wanted to
Date a White Guy...?
Buy Here or Buy at Amazon
 






 





 





 
 

1 comment:

Lucia said...

This blog post touched me very deeply, and very personally. I thank you so much for it. I have to say, I have read your entire backlog of blog posts, and I have pretty much read most of the "core" BWE blogs from their starts, working backwards, as a new BWE thinker (2-3 years of reading). I have never commented on one, so it is a big deal for me to be moved to finally come out of lurking to do so. Thank you again. Key part for me (I feel like the first paragraph, and I have a deep surety in my heart, my ex will be the second paragraph):

Some of these women who moved on might look back and regret, but the truth is that their 'timelines' did not coincide with where Simon was at the time. This is a reality of life and you should not kick yourself if you cant get yourself on the same page as your romantic other. Don't hang about or try to make them fit with what you want to do or where you want to be. You must have the courage to move on. Even if you see that later they went and did exactly what you wanted from them but with someone else, know that it wasn’t for you and them. It’s easy to say, 'maybe if I had waited', but it is unlikely they would have 'changed' for you.

A lot of people change because of experiences and often times we act as that experience for others. Coming across us might be that catalyst for a change in some people's lives. I know men who have mistreated women and lost a good thing, learning a hard lesson on how not to treat people for their future. Some white men have let priceless black girlfriends slip out if their fingers (and vice versa) because of family, nay sayers and what have you.